So I've played a demo of the recently released Dante's Inferno and I must say...I'm speechless [To say the least...]. Hmm, that voice sounded vaguely familiar [I'm offended, Inf...]. Nick [Yes...]? Wow! How the fu©k did you get there [Where???]? That's not important, just tell me how [I don't know...]. Well, you're an awful lot of help [Hahahahaha!!!]! Stop laughing [... ... ...]! Unlike Mr. Marshall, you at least, know your place [Bite me, Inf...] [Me too, jack@ss...]. You're double-teaming me?! That's low!
I was on PSN playing Modern Warfare II last night kicking some @ss while simultaneously getting my @ss kicked [Because Sony fails...]. That's unlike you, Mr. Marshall [Because I'm not Mr. Marshall...]. Figures [Someone call me???]. Lord, help me! You guys need a way for me to tell you two apart [How about bells???]! Not your best guess, Mr. Marshall [Okay, I have an idea...]. Yes, Nick [You think in words anyway, so how about color coding???]? Brilliant! Mr. Marshall, why do I even keep you around [... ... ...] [Hahahahaha!!!]?!
Okay, so I played Tekken 6 with a few guys from my building yesterday and it was a magnificent--[Wait, weren't you supposed to review Dante's Inferno???]...Yes! Dante's Inferno [Hahahahaha!!!]! Don't laugh at my expense, young man [... ... ...] [I hate you both...]. I don't recall speaking to you, Mr. Marshall [... ... ...]. Deterring from the topic of discussion...AGAIN, Nick will be in orange and Mr. Marshall will be in blue [I'm not a pumpkin...]. I didn't offer you a choice [... ... ...] [Hahahahaha!!!].
So, Naruto: Ultimate Ninja Storm--[Dante's Inferno...]...Damn. Thank you, Mr. Marshall [For what???]. For correcting me--[You can't even remember what color you made me?!!]...I apologize [You're not forgiven...] [Hahahahaha!!!]. This isn't going very well...at all. Maybe I'm not getting enough rest. I have been up until after 7 am the last few days. I really need to change my sleeping habits.
Anyway, Super Puzzle Fighter II Turbo: HD Remix--[Idiot...] [Hahahahaha!!!]...Again [Dante's Inferno, Jay...]?! *sigh* Dante's Inferno...geez! I wish I would stop doing that! You two are going to have to be quiet for a while [... ... ...] [... ... ...]. Thank you.
The poem Dante's Inferno was something I've never had the pleasure of reading, however, many of my peers have given it high ratings. The game Dante's Inferno seems to simply be an exploitation of Christian Templars. Based on his uniform and the timeline of the game, Dante is obviously a Templar from the crusades. This is wrong already. To produce a religiously biased game for children of other faiths to get ahold of is grossly irresponsible. If the Jewish people made a game and introduced it to the mass media market the other religious sects would explode with fury. The Muslim people would suffer the same fate as well as the Buddhists, etc.
Yes, I do believe in freedom of expression but the makers of this game have taken advantage of a prejudice. If no one else is allowed to do it, you shouldn't be allowed to either. I have a sour taste in my mouth just thinking about a specific faith invading the homes of others uninvited for the sake of turning a profit. Am I really wrong for addressing the influx of spiritual hustlers selling religion when THIS just happened?!
The controls are responsive and pretty accurate though, I have no complaint there. The graphics are wonderful though the female forms are a little polygonal. Visually this game is wonderful. I can honestly say I loved the camera angles, use of colors, and rich and animated environments. The concept of expanding your moveset with a tree of abilities is great too. You have the ability to customize your Dante to best suit your play style making certain sticky situations...well...less sticky.
Other than that, this game is God of War with a Christian zeitgeist spin. Zeus lightingbolts = Crucifix projectiles. Even the air combo system is the same...and the controller set up. Because I'm an avid God of War fan I found this game, including traps/puzzles and foes, very easy to conquer. To be honest, not very much of this game was original at all save the customizable moveset.
Making the types of moves you learn reliant upon the decisions you make in the game [Good or evil...] was conceptualized by the makers of the Fable series. Even the story, by description, sticks heavily to the script produced by the poem. Keep in mind I am only going off what I've heard from my peers when I refer to the poem.
Overall: Hit it, quit it, forget it. 6/10 stars
My mind is mad deep and you just jumped in
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